| all of a sudden, i feel ugly again |
[Saturday
April 18th, 2009 11:51pm] |
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I know im not as pretty as my friends and yea my tudong makes me look alot older than my real age. Even though its just a joke. It still hurts okay. Alot. I never ask to wear this headscarf. I've been told to wear it since i cam back from umrah in primary 4. So it really hurts to be called a makcik for something you never asked for. I know it is like a calling a something a praised thing. But when i get hurt by people's comments about this, it just makes me think. Alot have commented: Wee, you look better without tudong. Then (like they're obliged to say it) they say : But you look sweeter with a tudong. Please la. Im not stupid to fall for that. Its just OUCH you know. And im really tired now. And yea, WONDERFUL end to the day ey?
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| coz it hurts |
[Friday
January 30th, 2009 11:39pm] |
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I've fallen too deep and it hurts so bad. Sometimes the one person who can make you happy can hurt you badly as well.
I guess there's no such thing as a happy ending in real life...
I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale
I'm not the one you sweep off her feet,
Lead her up the stairwell
This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town,
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now it's too late for you
And your white horse, to come around
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| This lingering feeling |
[Monday
January 12th, 2009 10:07pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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not in the right mood |
] |
Is it perfectly fine for me to have this particular feeling? Lingering in there even after various attempts of getting rid of it? Should i be ok with it? Or should i do something more to make sure i really get my system cleansed? This sucks u knw. Haish.
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| What hurts the most |
[Wednesday
December 10th, 2008 9:42pm] |
What hurts the most
Was being so close
And havin' so much to say
And watchin' you walk away
):
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| I got confused |
[Tuesday
December 2nd, 2008 8:17pm] |
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Is it disappointment i feel?
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| MOVED |
[Friday
August 1st, 2008 10:52am] |
I've reactivated my blogger. Hehs. Gatal! Lol
anyways, here's the link to my blog.
BLOGGER
RELINK yea! :D
But i'll still blog in LJ once in awhile when im in the mood for it. Hehs
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| A lonely road, crossed another cold state line |
[Thursday
July 31st, 2008 7:24pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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bouncy |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Avenged Sevenfold - Dear God |
] |
Had a FANTABULOUS time with the class today. Anw, Ah Fab tore his pants. WAIT. I gotta laugh. HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAH.
Sorry ar Ah Fab! Hehs. (:
I dun wanna further elaborate hw he tore his pants.I wont disturb him anymore. Later he poke me, I DIE! Hahhas. But DAMN funny lor! HAHAS! Ok2. Anw, the class was UBER high during anatomy. We found a broken table at the lect theatre. Then they dismantled it. Then they were more high when we discussed abt bisexuals and transexuals and such. DAMN funny i tell u! Seemed as if i laughed non-stop throughout the day. Then the class wanted to go study but we ended up slacking, talking, playing and discussing about the class chalet. OOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUHHHHH! Cant wait la. Btw, GERALD WHEN U BOOKING THE CHALET?? OMG OMG! UBER EXCITED LA! It's gonna be super fun having chalet with the class. 6 more wks to chalet! Hehs! Got countdown some more. And it's gonna be during the fasting mth la. But nvm. Can sacrifice abit for the class. Hehs. Oh ya. I really had a bad wisdom toothache just now sia. It was effing painful i feel like screaming my lungs out. I pretended as if things were fine but seriously man. I was in real pain. Panadol didnt help much. I really hope the pain will subside. I really cannot take it la seh. I think i need to buy pain killers from the doc.
Anyways, im gonna try an "experiment". Wish me loads of luck horkaye. I hope he'll be okaye with the idea.
Anw, im really happy and thankful that i got into DBT 1A03. I really really hope nobody have to forward any modules.
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| andeverydaylifegoeson |
[Tuesday
July 29th, 2008 7:37pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 exhausted |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Mariah Carey - Bye bye |
] |
1 wk. many things happened. tears. unhappy thoughts. a heavy heart. loss of respect.
Watched the dark knight on friday. AWESOMENESS MAN!!! Hahs. Then went to the Henderson Bridge. I like the bridge when it's night time. Very relaxing and it's a great place to chill if you're stressed. So i think i may be going there more often. Even if im alone. (:
Had a 4 hr break just nw. Gymmed with the class. Then it was off to our usual tuesday routine, bowling. But all the lanes were taken. So it was off to play pool. It was kinda fun. First time playing. Lol. Of course you cant expect me to be a pro right. Nyahahs. But at least i hit 2 balls in, i think. hehs. But i thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiink i enjoy pool. So more pool next time yar! hehs. Had anatomy test ystd. No comments. Well, i deserve it la. I didnt really study hard for it. Anyhoos, i found my really really really old flame's profile. He's as good looking as i rmbred. Hahs. Those pri sch days. LOL. Ouhs. Im effing tired. THANKGAWD class starts at 12 tmr. WOOOHOOOO.
byebyebyebyebye. im tired.
*nudge* (inside joke) Hehs :p
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| Challenging? Bring it on babe! |
[Monday
July 21st, 2008 8:17pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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stressedandexhaustedtothemaxx! |
] |
| [ |
music |
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David Cook - Always be my baby |
] |
OHGAWD! Today was an extremely challenging day for me. OHGOSH. I dun even knw where to start. Hahs!
Ok2, first and foremost. Ystd night was a really baaaad night. I wanted to get to sleep at 1 plus. And at 2.15AM, i was still awake, tossing and turning trying to get to sleep. And best still, i got woken up at abt 4.40AM and since then i couldnt get back to sleep. Talk about having sleepless nights man. So i stayed awake until 7.10 i think. Then i attempted to have a nap coz i was really feeling too giddy. So yeap, aft printing out the PBL and going online and stuff, i tried to get to sleep. I did succeed in getting to sleep. But it lasted for about 10mins only. The rest of the time i was tossing and turning trying to get to sleep to get rid of the baaaaad headache. Ok. So when my mom came back from fetching my 2 yr old cousin, (my mom takes care of her), she was screaming her lungs out for i dun knw whatever reason. Apparently she was extremely pissed with my sis for not taking the PSAE form or whatever. Yeap, and im the victim of all the yelling and scolding while my sis locked herself in the room, away from the yelling and screaming and nagging. Imagine all that noise with the throbbing headache i had. OHGAWD. Then since my sis ignored my mom, i had to be the one to hand in her PSAE form for her. And since it's too late to hand it in, my mom had to write a deferral letter. And I had to wait until she's done. I was supposed to leave the house at 9 to avoid rushing and stuff. But by the time she's done with the letter, it was alrdy 9.20. Which means, i'd have to rush to the bus stop so that i wont miss the feeder servide and be late. But, whatthehoo,i missed the bus anyways. So because i didnt want to be late, i took a cab to Boon Lay MRT station. Which is only 15 mins walk frm my house. And guess how much the cab fare was. $5.15! With the surchange and everything. I would have walked but i was fasting and walking to the MRT station would mean that i'd reach school abit late. But the cab driver was kind enough to not count the 15cents. I know, only 15cents. But still, better than nothing! So i wasnt late to school. And before i left home this morning, i was frantically looking for the hole puncher coz i need to file the PBL. I wasted 10 mins looking for the stupid hole puncher until i gave up. When i was on the train to school, i was adjusting my tudong. Then, the tudong pin had to be stuck at another part of the tudong. So there i was looking like a fool in the train trying to let the pin loose. It finally got loose and everything was ok. Then when i reached school, i found out that there is going to be theory qns in the maths online quiz. My instant reaction was. WHAT!!!??? I didnt study for the test at all. For the calculations part, it would still be okaye. But the theory part would be a problem coz i have no idea what the maths notes is talking about. But the calculations part was okaye.
So that part of the bad day was done. I had a great day after that BUT, handing in the form for my sister was a disaster.
I went to the Admissions Office during my break. I thought it would be open. And it was my ONLY break for the day and i have to rush for my biophysics lecture after that. I thought, it would all be settled. But to my horror, it was closed for lunch. Hmph. At that moment of time i was kinda pissed and i called my mom. And i rushed/ran to class. Then, i thought i should give it another try after my Anatomy lecture. So i left a teeny bit early and rushed for the Admissions Office, AGAIN. When i saw that it was open, my heart jumped for joy. Like it literally went YESSAAR! Then when i handed the form to the person, she said. "Sorry dear, you'll have to go to the Finance Office". There and then, i wanted to cry. WTF. I was gonna late for Dr Xu's lecture. So i rushed/ran/briskwalked to the Finance Office. And there was a line. OH WOW WONDERFUL!. I patiently waited. And waited. And waited. When it was FINALLY my turn, i thought i could simply drop the form and go. By the i was alrdy 10mins late for the lecture. BUT there were some complications and i had to call my mom and settle the thing there and then. When everything was FINALLY settled, i rusehd to Dr Xu's lecture. I was 20mins late btw. When i sat down, i was shivering. I think i was rushing around too much. Then when i looked up. Dr Xu glared at me coz i came for lecture late. Hmph! And all this wasnt my fault at all. I was simply helping my sis hand in her form. Yes, at that moment i really felt like crying. But i held back my tears. I was too rushed, stressed, my mind was too muddled up to pay attention. Yes, my sister really owe me man.
Oh btw, I wanna THANK SHARIFAH, HAMIZAH and GERALD for helping me carry my laptop! I'll treat you guys to a tub of B&J one day yea! (:
Hey there.
Stop toying with my heart boy.
Coz it isnt some game that can be played.
This heart,
Has already been crushed by you.
And if it happens a second time boy.
I just wanna let you know
That my heart would just go down crumbling.
So boy,
Stop what you're doing.
And just tell me what you're truly feeling.
But if,
You dont feel that way,
Please think of me.
And stop all these games.
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| The long awaited update. |
[Friday
July 18th, 2008 1:41am] |
| [ |
mood |
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all smiles |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Chris Brown - Forever |
] |
BEWARE! POST IS IMAGE HEAVY!
Sesungguhnye aku sungguh malas nk update blog. * means = Im so lazy to update. But wth. Just update ar! Many many things to update. Coz many many things happened. nyahas.
First and foremost, I got a new hp! (: YAY! So byebye to that red vintage hp. And HELLO to that new sexaye phone! I got the sony ericsson shake phone. White & gold. Classy and glam! I LIKE! Hehs. Ok so you guys, the PRs, cannot disturb me alrdy hor! My hp got camera alrdy horkaye! hahas.
And and last thurs, 10 july i think, my grp had CRS presentation. Not bad la. I feel that our grp did quite good. And for the first time i was really confident and comfortable when i presented my counter arguments and rebuttals although at one point of time, i lost my train of thoughts and my script got mixed up. And that was when the accidental "SHIT" came. Hahas. Hopefully Mdm Nora didnt hear it uh. But it was quite loud la. So most prob she heard it. But whatthehoo. I think overall i did okaye. Even though i prepared only the night before. Hehs.
On sat, went out with Nad, Anum and Zaya for lunch. Nad's advanced bdae lunch since she couldnt join us for the henderson bridge outing the ext day coz she's going out with ash. But nvm, the lunch was great and it was so funny la. Hahas. The other PRs couldnt make it. But nvm. As long as Nad enjoyed her time with us. Nad enjoy tk? Hahas. And OF COURSE, since i bought a new phone, wiwi have to jakon and keep taking pictures. Nyahahas.
And sunday was the HENDERSON BRIDGE day.Very very pretty! I LIKE! It was a tiring hike up the bridge but it was all worth it. Camwhored alot. Took more than 250 pics. And that's only frm my hp camera! LOL! OK2. Let the pics do the talking. hahas. I fell sick on Friday. So i wasnt really my high hyper self. Hahas. But camwhoring seemed to have cured me abit. Nyahas. The power of camwhoring. Hahas.
On monday, I didnt go to sch. I had the Scholarship Ceremony rehearsal. Yea, pretty boring coz we just sat there and waited for our turn to go on stage. That's pretty much it. Hahas.
Tuesday was FUN day. Hahas. The class went to play bowling again. This time i joined in the fun. Seems like tuesdays have become bowling day uh! Hahas. Of course, we camwhored. Hahs.
mizah fell aft this shot. hahas. it was hilarious. we were like omg are you okay? and stuff like that. appearently she stepped too far out onto the lane. thanks for the memories babe!
ignore my face. i look drunk. nyahahs.
AND my fav pic for that day is....
DAMN cool rite? CREDITS to Gerald who jumped frm the table.
Nothing much happened on wed. Except for getting the final MST paper. Alhamdulillah. I passed everything except for biophysics. But i got more than i expected for biophysics even though i failed. Coz i expected to fail badly but i got a borderline fail instead. So yea, pretty okaye.
Thursday was the actual day for the Scholarship Award Ceremony. This is my first time wearing something very very formal. But my outfit is nice. I LIKE! Hahas. So yea, pretty much like the same old award ceremony. But aft all the awards were given out, we, the scholars were supposed to give roses to our parents. That part was really really sweet. I almost teared. Hehs. The food they have were YUMMAY! But to bad, i didnt really have the appetite to eat even though i have not eaten anythng the whole day. I only tasted a few stuff. [And the cheesecakes were YUMMAY!!!! (: ] Then i headed home instead of following my parents to my uncle's hse coz my cousin got married. Coz i was too tired and my initial plan was to sleep once i reached home. But I went online and here i am, still blogging at 1.35AM. LOL! Anw, i got interviewed by the news reporter from the malay paper. (Berita Harian i presume). So yea, keep a look out for my face in the newspaper! Nyehehes. AND AND!! This is the ULTIMATE COOLNESS THING EVER!!. They gave all the scholars a PARKER PEN! Can you believe it?? PARKER PEN. Freaking ex luh! Hahas.
And my formal outfit for the event. (:
Im somehow happier now. Im not sure what made me happier. (:
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| HAPPY 18th BIRTHDAY NADIRAH BTE JAMRI |
[Sunday
July 13th, 2008 10:59am] |
| [ |
mood |
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HAPPY BDAE NAD! |
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| [ |
music |
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Birthday Song |
] |
Actually, I was planning to be inactive on my lj for 1 mth coz I felt like i needed time to straighten out my mind and feelings. But, because it's one of my PR's bdae, i shall break my inactiveness and dedicate her a post. (:
so here goes.
HAPPY 18th BIRTHDAY NADIRAH BTE JAMRI!!!!
My good friend since sec 3. (: Oh those slenge days. To be frank, before i got to know you, i was kinda scared of you, yknw. Coz you always look so fierce. HAWHAW!! OK once i got to knw you, aiyah tak payah takot ar. You're just as crazy as meeeee. (: And it was fate that brought us together in the same class. I really miss those days when all the madness ruled us and we had animal names and whatnots. And you were a baboon! Pasal nad pantat! Hahas. And rmbr what peacock said? "I dont care what you do at the back of the class. You can eat, drink, you can even have sex at the back of the class." LOL. And rmbr Chiang Ah Choo's l-a-u-g-h-i-n-g gas? And the hair flips? We used to try to count the no. of times she flipped her hair in a day. Heehee. Those were the days la. I really miss the four of us at the back of the class doing stupid things and stuff. Haish. Now everyone is busy with sch and whatnots. Anyways, i hope u enjoyed lunch and the surprise ystd. And there's more to come. (: May your life be blessed and be full of joy babe!
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| well.... |
[Tuesday
July 8th, 2008 9:26pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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toomanythingsluh |
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Today was a bad tudong day. My tudong was all over the place. And i saw an old flame. Of all days, i have to see him on my bad tudong day. And i wonder if the flame is reigniting or was i just remembering the flames that used to be there or the flame wasnt really put out in the first place.
Anyways, there's been a lot of things on my mind lately. Too many things. I may not be blogging for a while. Anyways, a lot of ppl say i should sleep early and be more punctual for lessons. So yar, im gonna sleep really early today. (:
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| report |
[Friday
July 4th, 2008 12:11am] |
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siak la. mcm nk nangis seh. apelah yg aku dah buat smpai aku dpt grp ni? haish. sungguh menyakitkn hati la seh. end up aku yg kene buat report ni. mcm siak seh. argghh. bsk nk kene hantar. skrg dah pukul 12 lebih. mcm %#%#%$&!! haish. seriously la seh. nampaknye tak tido lagi la ni. dah la smlm tk tido buat bsbm report. hari ni ingt kn at least boleh tido kepe. ni tak. si irritating tu kate dah buat abeh tk hantar. mcm nk sepak je. yg lagi satu ckp sibuk abeh tk sempat nk buat. mcm aku ni free sgt gitu. yg lagi satu buat ar part die. bagus2. sekurang-kurangnye mengurangkan beban aku ni. haish. betol seh. sungguh membingitkan.
wow. sungguh melayu. hahas. ok. aku tulis melayu pasal ahli2 kumpulan aku tk paham bahasa mlayu.
peace no war.
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| this heart is too precious to be out there |
[Thursday
July 3rd, 2008 2:04am] |
| [ |
mood |
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im in a smiley mood |
] |
I finished a 12 page report in 2 nights. Coolness huh? 2 late nights and im done. And the report is very satisfying. So, yep im happy. (: And i should actually be sleeping nw rite. But whatthehoo, i cant sleep. And dewi is online. And dewi is my MSN game buddy. So yea, we're playing taitee. Wheee. Addictive game.
Oh yar. I've gotten back my maths and chem papers. Maths was the best! (: Chem was ok. I havent get back the other 3 papers. But i knw i will definitely fail biophysics. And i think for anatomy and biosystems i will get a borderline pass. Or maybe even an F. Oh well, it's only MSTs. Hahas.
Watching Get Smart with the class tmr. And then to B&J. I hope the outing goes according to plan. (:
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| more photoshop therapy |
[Monday
June 30th, 2008 1:51am] |
| [ |
mood |
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still undergoing therapy |
] |
yes. more therapy. photoshop therapy.
btw, i miss you babes so much. (:
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| MSTs over! |
[Friday
June 27th, 2008 1:41pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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time to parteeey!!! |
] |
MSTs are over! LIKE FINALLY! wheee.. Im a free woman. Chey. Woman seh. Anyway, had biophyics paper just now. It was a killer. THE WORST PAPER I HAD FOR THE WEEK. Mcm nak mamps. I couldnt answer a lot of qns. But i just answered them anyhow. Lols. Anatomy and biosystems tied for second worst paper. But it wasnt that bad. Can pass la. But just dun knw hw well i'd do. The next one is maths followed by APchem. APchem damn syiok la! First time i had confidence in chem.
WOOOOHOOOO!!! It's time to parteeeey baybeh! lols. But still have 3 reports to finish. Haish.
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